The Longest Unzipping of My Life

Angie had to go to Costco yesterday after I got home from school, but she was sleeping in her room when I arrived. She had to get her meds; she’s on antidepressants. Sometimes, I hate going to her house cuz she has the place FREEZING ASS COLD. She slept for another two hours before I told her the time and hurried her ass up and out the door. I’m really impatient when I know something has to be done and she’s just putzing around.

While she was at the pharmacy, I couldn’t help but look at netbooks. I’d gotten her both a laptop and a netbook earlier in the year. I bought her a wee netbook when she was bitching about her laptop for something or another, just as a joke. Short woman, itsy bitsy computer. I spoil her sometimes, but it comes with the territory. She’s a great cook! Great sex with a woman who can cook, is all I ask.

I let her drive cuz I can’t see for shit at night.

Did you want to stop off anywhere?

Like what?

You said you wanted to do something else.

How about we go straight home and fuck.

That sounds like a plan.

It was 20:30 by the time we got home. I almost tripped over the suitcase she was packing. She had to go to Seattle for one of her best friend’s wedding and left early this morning.

I was hungry and she made us some boiled shrimp with cocktail sauce and mash potatoes. Just something quick. While I was fucking around with the gongs, she came in with this camisole thing and a white dress.

What do you think?

About?

This.

What is it?

Its a tummy toner. I’m going to wear it with this dress. [She wore a long sleeveless dress with an embroidered flowery pattern and string straps.] Zip me up?

I don’t see anything wrong with you.

I’m getting fat. This smushes my belly.

You have a cute belly. Its my scratching post.

Do you want to die prematurely, old man?

I’m just sayin … there’s nothing wrong with you. I think all women think they’re fat.

Well what do you think?

Looks weird with the toner strap sticking out and the spaghetti straps barely covering it. I mean, that’s my opinion.

Yeah. I’m going to have to not wear the toner straps and put it under my dress.

Yup. I think your boobs are big enough to where they can keep the toner up. Goddamn you got some nice boobs! [I put my hands on each boob].

Hmm. Well, I don’t want it to drop down to my waist when I’m dancing.

You’re gonna dance?

Of course I’m going to dance. You know, after the wedding there’s going to be a reception? And party?

How long you gonna be gone?

Just a couple of days. Tuesday by the latest. Don’t worry, honey. I’m not going to fuck around on you. Why would I?

I’m just sayin … people get drunk at parties and do stupid shit.

You should trust me by now. I think we should take a shower together.

O RLY?

I got out of the shower quick. She likes to soak up all the hot water. Lil shower hog. I just dried off my hair and went outside on the deck naked. Let the wind dry me off. I went into my car and got the last joint I had rolled up and started taking drags off it. Angie continued to pack. I told her that the airlines are only going to let you check in with 50 lbs., and after that, its $25 added on top of her ticket. I went back outside.

Are you walking around naked outside again?

Yeah, I’m drying off.

She comes outside, totally naked too.

Its a beautiful night.

I’m glad you live way the fuck out here. Want a smoke?

We both take hits. She went inside and came out with two pillows and a sleeping bag. While she’s taking a drag, I spread her legs apart and go under her, burying my face in her vulva. It seemed like I haven’t eaten pussy in so long. I hear her, and then she spreads wider. We change positions and the little woman’s on her back. My fingers, tongue, and other hand are on every erogenous zone. Her sweet moans build up into a climax and she stiffens in an orgasm that leaves her rigid and and frozen for a minute. And we go to town, fucking each other’s brains out. We try every position possible; as far as I could shove my dick in her from every angle. I smack her juicy bubblebutt butt and pull on her hair. She digs in my back with her nails and bites on my neck and shoulders. We were again bathing in each other’s sweat and bodily fluids. I get behind her and position her towards the wind then slam her doggystyle. First on one knee, then lifting myself up in a squat position and just railing away at her with her vaginal muscles tightening around my dick as she has another monster orgasm. I pull out and squirt my gob all over her sweaty, juicy butt. Before I’m emptied of my babymaking goo, she sits up and swallows my dick into her mouth. I fuck her mouth as she eats me whole. She pushes me on my back and goes down on me again. I’m freaking senseless my now and craving to slurp on her clit again.

Not now. I’m eating you.

She said. Nothing in the world compares to having great sex with Angie … except maybe eating a delicious juicy medium-rare steak. We must have fucked outside for an hour and a half cuz we barely heard the timer in the kitchen go off.

What’s that?

Oh, I’m suppose to call Kim in an hour, but I guess its too late.

Yeah don’t call her. Its fucking midnight.

We were laying on the sleeping bag outside by the front porch where there’s a small patch of grass under the shade of a cholla tree. She went on talking about the stars. I told her about this star that I thought was a plane cuz it kept moving in my stoned, delusional state. Angie went on and on about my star saying it was Venus and then saying, “I could be wrong”.

You always do that.

What?

You’ll go on about some tangent about something and then ending it with some random quip like, “I could be wrong”.

I leave it open to interpretation.

By then, I’m just rolling. Busting a nut, laughing my ass off. Angie’s laughing too but she turned facing my side with her right leg on my groin area. Both of us, stoned and naked under the stars.

Angie left two hours ago. I’m missing her already. So in between working in the city and driving out into the badlands, I’m house-sitting at her place with two fucking cats!

I JES REELY DUNT LYKE CATS.

The Gila

We spent a total of ten days in the Gila Wilderness, New Mexico, and it just seemed like time stood still … being way in the deep woods. I like camping for days on end and seeing little to no people for miles around. On the fourth day out, we went to the the Gila Cliff Dwellings and Angie got so sick that I thought I was gonna have to go find a hospital and admit her. She said she had “some massive negative energy” coming from the ancient Indian cliff dwellings.  She’s a sponge for negative stuff so I don’t really know what went on with her. Myself, I got sick or whatever Angie had the next day later. Strange, but we promised ourselves not to vacation there anymore. Maybe it was just a random incident that both of us got feverishly sick. I don’t know.

As for anything else, Angie started nursing school and myself, I started my pre-reqs to nursing school and I’m also taking classes for a degree in systems administration/networking. I think I’ll be in school forever. Now.

Vacation At Last!

We’re going to the Gila Hot Springs in New Mexico on the 10th and will be gone for almost three weeks. Aww yeah!

I need a vacation cuz I haven’t been on one in close to two years. i

Yep.

That’s the plan instead of Plan A, which was to go see Remy, Jason and Shy in Georgia. The cross-country traveling is taking a back seat for now with the stuff that’s been going on the past week. Can’t really say much about it cuz she doesn’t want it posted anywhere online. So I’ll just leave it at that.

Witchblazed

I love Angela to death, but damn. She just gets on my nerves. I haven’t left Tucson yet cuz work asked me if I wanted to pick up an overtime shift tonight. The lil woman called me a few hours ago and told me the news.

BUN IN THE OVEN.

I’m like

So no new house. No more roadtripping. No more travelling overseas on my own.

And … I’m going to shoot myself in the ass. NOW.

Goodbye.

The End.

No Ass Is Worth Death

That’s what my friend, Sabrina, was telling me about when she was younger.

We hung out today; actually worked out at the gym. She’s my hot MILF friend, and we’re ten years apart and she’s fucking hot. I even told her that today after we were done at the gym.

She actually called me this morning whilst I was working out on my patio: I have a 325 lb. Olympic-sized weight bench there.

What’re you doing?

Working out. Why?

Come work out with me.

Ppftt. Why? You never call me except when you want something.

Can’t I just be friendly and hang out with my friends?

Fine. I’ll meet you there since I live way the fuck on the other side of town.

How long? I live 2 minutes away.

Dude. Gimmme 45 minutes. I’ll call you when I’m half way there.

Sabrina had cosmetic surgery done and hadn’t worked out for a year. When she didn’t return my call, I figured she’s one of those “fair weather” friends that agree to do something with you but never follow through. I did my chest/back/lat/trap workout, finished and headed off to my car. My phone had 8 missed calls from Sabrina. One voicemail. She was taking a shower to go to the gym. WTF does that? You’re gonna get sweaty yet you still take a shower before going to the gym. Ppfftt.

Sabrina looked pretty. First time I’ve seen her away from work without wearing scrubs. At 5′9, 138 lbs., that’s perfect. Anyway, whatever. She wanted to work on her arms and upper body. I showed her which machines to do and which does what. By the time we were done, her arms were wet noodles. She suggested we walk around Reid Park, which in its shortest distance is 3 miles around; longest is 6 miles. My calves were killing me. Her long legs were like watching an ostrich in motion. I felt like a fucking dwarf dwaddling after her.

After the gruelling 3 mile WALK, I needed a break, but she wouldn’t let me stop, so my legs were noodles compared to her arms. I was starving by the time we reached her car.

Dude. I’m totally freaking hungry.

Yeah me too. What’s there to eat on this side of town?

What do you want to eat?

[I wanted to say, "pussy", but that was out of the question.] Meat. I want meat. Its protein day.

Fuddrucker’s is really good. Want to buy me lunch?

Yeah sure. What’re you broke?

Till payday, yeah.

How the hell can you be broke? I thought all you single mothers have a shitload of tax breaks with your kids.

Hello? I only work one job, Alain. I don’t get that money back till the end of the year. Besides, I only make $1300 a month. I pay 570 in rent and I pay daycare 500 and bills have to be paid in between.

Fuck. Oh yeah, I say “fuck” alot if you haven’t noticed. That’s how it works. I got a question. Why are we even talking again? For a while there, I fucking hated your guts.

Well, let’s be honest Alain. I hated yours too. I think its because we’re friends and we’re always going to be friends and I didn’t take that shit personally. You are my friend. Just tell those bitches at work to kick rocks. You shouldn’t let them run all over you. Those RNs I mean.

I used to think Amanda the med nurse was hot till she pissed me off about Angela. Then, I just don’t give a fuck anymore. I even told her off. Amanda was saying that Angela’s way too young for me and shit.

Dude. Age is just a fucking number. Better tell those bitches to back off you.

Junnoliek, I thought you had another job. You still work it? And somebody told me you were a stripper?

Dude. I have way more self respect for myself than to be a stripper. Why would I want to do that? Ninety nine percent of the patients that come to the ER, know me. Its because we see those frequent flyers all the time. You know that. And I can’t work my other job because I won’t get my daycare for my kids.

Hmm. That explains it.

What happened to that other girl you were seeing?

Dude. She was totally straight up bipolar psycho. And she wanted me to move with her to be in that whole growing ganja shit.

Yeah. Its good that you dumped her. I wouldn’t want to be around you either. You know, in Arizona, you can be busted for just being friends with a person drugging. Its called a “No Accomplice” law. Say like I robbed a 7-11 and you were just in the car. You’d get busted too because you did nothing to stop me. The No Accomplice law.

How do you know this shit?

My whole family was into drugs and dealing. When I was younger, I was a dealer. And then, I was dating this guy who was a dealer. I got out of it when some dude shot at me. No ass is worth death. Life is too short for an ass that will get you dead.

Sabrina laughed a quirky little laugh and so did I. We ate at Fuddrucker’s which is an excellent burger joint. She had a 1/3 lb. burger and I inhaled this 1/2 lb. burger. It didn’t even last two minutes in my hands. So yeah, it was cool to hang out with my assertive young tomboy friend, no longer an enemy. She’s seeing some paramedic that comes in every so often in the ER. I like women like her; strong-willed, opinionated, a little bit on the tomboyish side, smart, and optimistic. My girlfriend falls in this category.

Man in the Boat

So Ange was telling me about the “man in the boat”.

>>Did you ever see that South Park episode where the Police Chief is under the Mayor’s desk as she’s ushering the kids to go home or something? And the Chief says he can’t find the man in the boat, but the Mayor says, “Keep looking! You’re not trying hard enough!” A bunch of people go in and out of her office and finally the Chief says, “I think I’ve found it!”<<

She was talking about another word/phrase for “clit”, “clitoral hood”.

Hike NAKED

I woke up this morning with the urge to go hiking naked behind Angela’s house cuz its quiet, secluded and no one up early in the morning. Then I heard rain drops. Motherfucker. It always rains whenever you want to do something out of the ordinary. So … I went back to sleep. I couldn’t sleep. Too wide awake so early in the morning and I’m not a morning person.

Its kinda cool watching her sleep. The way her breasts look when she’s laying on her back; her head to the side of the pillow. Her flowing black hair mottled across her face. No tattoos or piercings violate her pristine lithe body. Angela wears little make up but what little she does, accentuates her natural beauty.

I feel like a giddy retard in bliss all over again.